Breastfeeding Uncovered: Who really decides how we feed our babies? - Amy Brown

Breastfeeding Uncovered: Who Really Decides How We Feed Our Babies? by Amy Christine Brown
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

It's taken me a long time to read this, not because it was a hard read, or I didn't enjoy it. It had more to do with the fact that I just dipped into it from time to time. Which is a bit of a shame really, it was both interesting and engaging.
In many ways, this follows on from the ground covered by The Politics of Breastfeeding: When Breasts Are Bad for Business. I read that some years ago now and in this book, I could see some of those themes were continued. This time, it was more to do with supporting women to breastfeed and why that might go wrong.
Much of the information in this book is common sense when you stop and think about it. Sadly though, when it comes to the highly emotive topic of feeding babies, stopping and thinking about it is the last thing that happens.
In this book, Amy Brown lays out an 18 step plan for helping more women to breastfeed. For anyone who is involved in supporting women with babies, or has a baby themselves or within their family, then this is a handy checklist. Am I doing anything, consciously or otherwise that might be damaging the breastfeeding partnership?
The main downside of this book is that I suspect for the most part it is preaching to the converted. Who is going to be interested in reading a book called Breastfeeding Uncovered? For the most part, I suspect that it will be people who already have a vested interest in the topic, either as breastfeeding women, or peer supporters. (Both categories that I fall, or have fallen, into.) It is a shame that books like this don't attract a wider audience. Particularly when you consider that the overriding message of this book is that if we wish to help more women to breastfeed and remove much of the guilt and angst that surrounds being unable to do so, then a shift in the society as a whole is necessary.
Overall this was an interesting and thought-provoking read, whilst still being accessible and easy to read.

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Tandem feeding troubles

This is the second time I've been a tandem feeder, I fed my now 4 year old with my now 2 1/2 year old for over six months, until my son (the 4 year old) self weaned.  This time round, we're about 4 months in to the tandem feeding, and I can't see my 2 1/2 year old showing any signs of wanting to stop.

In some ways it's nice, I think it helps with the jealousy, and my daughters are showing signs of becoming quite close.  But it's not all good, there are difficulties.  My eldest daughter like's a feed at bedtime, and my youngest is generally in the evening grumps stage, so I have to feed them both at once.  I know that I'm an experienced tandem feeder, but I struggle with actually feeding both at once.  It's much easier and far more comfy to breastfeed one and then the other, and I sometimes feel that by having to share the feed, my older daughter is missing out on the one on one time with me that she used to have.  Having said that, I'm not convinced that she's that bothered.

The other MAJOR downside is illness, we all know that breastfeeding is supposed to help children to resist illness and boost their imune system, but what happens when the older one is ill?  My baby is bound to get it too.  With the odd cough and cold, things haven't been too bad, but last week hand foot and mouth struck.

Not really the kind of thing that I want my four month old coming down with, but by the time the symptoms showed it was probably too late.  It's difficult though, what to do, I don't want to pass these things on to my youngest, but I don't really want to deny her sister the comfort of a feed, especially when she's unwell.....

So, I read around, did a bit of research, and in actual fact tandem feeding was probably the best thing for both of them.  The chances of Anja not coming into contact with her older sisters bugs was pretty slim, especially as we didn't know she had anything.  But by feeding her I'm helping her immune system deal with it, and by feeding my older daughter too I'll be helping her beat the bug.

They both seem to be doing ok now, Lena is all but over it, and Anja has had a few spots on her feet, a slightly grumpy day (which could just as easily have been down to teeth at this age) and nothing else so far.  Touch wood they're both on the mend now.

Kai's Birth Story; two and a half years on.

I really, really meant to do this
sooner, much sooner.  I'm not really sure how much I remember of
Kai's birth, it was over two and a half years ago now.  What I
do know, is that at the time, I hadn't really come to terms with what
happened, and perhaps if I'd done this sooner, it would have be
easier to deal with.

The whole of my pregnancy with Kai had been
very easy and straight forward, with no problems or things to worry
about.  I fully expected the birth to be fairly straight
forward, and I think that I could have been more prepared for things
not quite going to plan.  I had thought, right from the start
that Kai would be late, just because my Mum was late having the three
of us, and I'd got it into my head that Kai would arrive on the 1st
October.  I wasn't surprised that I reached 41 weeks, with no
sign of a baby, (apart from my huge bump of course.)  I was
given a sweep on the Wednesday, which was really quite uncomfortable
(not that I expected it to be a nice experience) as I hadn't started
to dilate at all.  I thought nothing of it really, and didn't
expect anything to happen. 
The next morning, I sat up in
bed, ready to do lots of things to keep my mind off waiting for the
baby, and found myself sitting in a pool of water.  It took me a
few minutes to realise that things might be starting, and for some
reason, I seemed more concerned with tidying up the mess, than
ringing the hospital.  Once I finally got myself into gear, and
called the hospital, I began to feel quite excited.  Mike was
working in Leicester at the time, and had to travel back home, and
have a shower before we headed to the hospital.  We spent the
next hour or so in the delivery suite, being monitored, but as I was
still to have any contractions, they booked me in for an induction on
Saturday morning if nothing happened in the mean time, and sent me
off home.  I spent the next day and evening in front of the TV,
waiting for something to happen, but alas, nothing.
The next
morning, I noticed that the liquid on my pad had changed colour
again, so we spent a second morning in the delivery suite with me
attached to the monitors, but still nothing had changed.  I was
getting the odd tightening, but nothing that looked like he was on
his way.  It didn't help that Kai kept kicking the heart monitor
pad out of the way, and we ended up being in there for quite a
while.
That evening I finally started to get regular contractions,
at around 11 pm.  Not really enough to say that things had
started, but too intense to let me get any sleep.  I spent the
night playing around on the computer, and watching television, (there
really is very little on in the wee small hours.) Finally at around 5
am I called the hospital again, and they told me to come in. 
For the third morning in a row I found myself in the delivery suite,
attached to the monitors.
As the morning progressed, there was
very little change, I'd barely dilated at all, and they decided to
speed things up with the drip.  I was doing quite well at this
point and managing without any pain relief at all.  As they
increased the dose and I found the contractions stronger and closer
together, I started using the gas and air.  I should have tried
to be on my feet more at this stage, not easy when you're strapped to
the heart monitor, but not impossible, and I could have stood up a
bit more.
When they checked me to see how dilated I was, the
midwife thought that Kai's head felt a bit soft, more like his
bottom, so they decided to scan him, and check that he wasn't
breach.  He was head down, but he'd been squashed down for so
long without coming out that it made his head feel soft.  As we
were there for so long, when the shift changed, the next midwife and
doctor had the same concern and had to check again, so I found myself
having two scans while in labour. 
By about lunch time, I
was feeling very tired, and finding the contractions harder to cope
with.  Poor Mike had gone without food all morning so I sent him
off to get some sandwiches.  I expected him to nip out to the
car, and come straight back, but he ate them first and then called a
few people, so by the time he returned, it felt like he'd been
hours.  I was beginning to feel I needed more for the pain too. 
We called the midwife in, she started checking the read-outs from the
monitor.  With every contraction, Kai was having something
called an "early" which basically meant that his heart rate
was dropping.  They were concerned that it could be a sign that
he was distressed, and so to check that all was well they decided to
take a blood sample.  I didn't really take in what this
involved, but soon found my feet in stirrups, while they tried to
scratch the top of his head.  Trying to fit it all in between
contractions, meant that it took three attempts, and I'm sure that I
had half of the hospital staff in the room, peering up between my
legs at one point.
They couldn't decide one way or another if he
really was distressed, but suddenly I had the whole world in my room,
discussing which theatre was free.  I couldn't quite get my head
around the thought that I was about to have a section, and the next
thing I knew, I was being wheeled away to theatre.
When they put
the spinal block in, it was a wonderful feeling, suddenly all the
pain was gone, and I started to fall asleep.  Mike asked me what
it felt like, and was told off by one of the theatre nurses, because
I had more important things on my mind right now.  They put a
screen up to shield my lower half, and for a moment I was quite
worried, as I could see my legs reflected in the light above me, but
they soon covered that, so I couldn't see.  All of the hospital
staff who weren't actually doing something right then, stood with
their hands clasped in front of them, and Mike told me later, that he
thought they were about to start preying, I'm told that it's the best
position to stand in, to keep your hands sterile though.
The
section itself was a bit of a blur, I remember being thrown about a
bit, because he was wedged in quite well, but I remember little until
he was pulled out.  We didn't know what we were having, so the
consultant had shouted out, "it's a boy," before I got to
see him.  They carried him over to be checked out, and I saw a
little blue baby, with the longest arms and legs I had ever seen. 
It was just how he seemed, but that first sight is burned into my
memory for ever.  He was absolutely fine, and none the worse for
his ordeal.  The wrapped him in a blanket and let me hold him
for a minute or two, and then gave him to Mike while I was sorted out
and tidied up.
It was around this point that I went into shock, I
only know that's what it was because of a recent first aid course I
had done, and it was nothing like I had expected.  I felt so
cold, colder than I've ever been before, and although they wrapped me
in a couple of heated blankets, it took quite a while for me to feel
normal again.
The last thing that I had expected to happen, was
that I would end up having a section, and I was totally unprepared
for it.  I felt for a long time that I had somehow failed Kai,
and I would get quite upset when I thought about it.  I came to
terms with it more as time went on, and having Mahe really helped. 
I felt so good after his birth, and not having to have a second
section, that I think that it got rid of the final negative thoughts
I had about Kai's birth.

Welcome to the world Mahe Finn

Mahe Finn

I've been meaning to do this for weeks, well three weeks and four days to be exact, since little Mahe was born.  Well, finally I'm getting round to it, writing his birth story, and then, just for balance, and because I didn't do it before, I think that I might do Kai's too, although that's two years, three weeks and three days overdue!
Despite feeling for the last couple of months, that this baby might actually be early, instead of overdue, the 23rd of September came and went and still no sign of anything happening, apart from the Braxton Hicks contractions that I'd been having for weeks.  I went to see the consultant on Friday morning, and he booked me in for an induction the following Thursday, I was really worried that he might have put me in for Kai's birthday on the Tuesday, which was the last thing that I wanted, but fortunately he didn't.  He also gave me a sweep, and said I was already 21/2 to 3 cm diallated, so things were looking good.  I fully expected to start in labour in the next few hours or so!  Needless to say I didn't and come Sunday morning I was feeling very dejected, as 48 hours had passed since the sweep and nothing had begun. I was beginning to feel really quite desperate, as I really didn't want to be induced, or have the new baby on Kai's birthday, and not only that I was feeling HUGE and so uncomfy!
Later that day, after having a nap, I started to get contractions, I'd had about three, twenty minutes or so apart before I let myself believe that things might be happening.  They got gradually stronger and closer together as the afternoon progressed, and after tea Mike took Kai over to my Mum and Dad's in case we needed to go into the hospital later that night.  As it was I'd watched Heartbeat, and Poirot was just starting when I decided that it was maybe time to go into the hospital, as they were about five minutes apart.
They checked me out when I got to the hospital, and I'd reached 31/2 to 4 cm, but obviously I still had a long way to go.  As I'd had a c-section last time, they were keeping a close eye on me, so they kept me in rather than send me home.  Mike got to go home for some sleep, but I just spent a couple of hours doing crosswords and looking at those trashy magazines that I only read when I'm at the doctors or dentist or such like.  After a few hours or so, I called the midwife and I'd progressed to around 5 cm and they moved me down to the delivery suite, as there was room, and called Mike back in.
It was about 5am on the Monday by this point, and I was hopeful that things would progress fairly quickly and I'd soon have my baby.  In case I had to have a drip for some reason, they came to put the thing that they put in your hand in my hand (really complicated way of putting that and I have NO idea what the technical term for all of that is!)  Only I have apparently quite small veins in the back of my hand, and it went in but came out the other side and ouch did it hurt!  They had to put it in my wrist instead and the back of my hand swelled up, and every time I moved my arm or hand it really ached.  I know that considering what else was happening, it would seem strange to complain about the pain from that, but really I think that it was one of the most painful things that happened that day.
Unfortunately when they checked me later, I hadn't progressed any further, so they decided to try and rupture my waters to get things moving.  Not that that was a problem, I was just disappointed that things hadn't got any further on their own.  A couple of hours later they checked me again, and as I still hadn't progressed they discussed the next step.  Basically I could either go onto a drip to move things along, or have a c-section.  I still really really wanted my vbac, although I'd been there for such a long time that I have to admit that I was tempted.  They put me on the drip, and although I'd used nothing up to this point, I asked for some gas and air, as the contractions were getting to me a bit.  A little while later the consultant came in, (not my consultant) and made it clear that he thought I should be having another section, they decided to give me until 4pm and then monitor things again. 
All morning, and through three shift changes of midwives, they had been really impressed that I'd not needed any pain relief, and I was just sitting there doing my crosswords, watching tv and being generally quite cheerful.  They increased the drip every half hour, and as they put it up to the strongest dose, I'm afraid that I had to ask for something a bit stronger to help with the pain.  They gave me a choice of an epidural, which I didn't want, Pethadrin, or something beginning with M which was similar to Pethadrin, but didn't last as long or effect the baby,  I decided to go for that, as I only had under two hours to go until they would send me in for a section if nothing had happened.  They gave me a jab in my thigh, about half an hour later, and it kicked in another twenty minutes after that.  It didn't really do much for the pain, just made me fel really light headed, so I felt a bit disconnected from the pain so it was easier to deal with.
Half an hour later I suddenly got this overwhelming urge to push, it took me totally by surprise, and I quickly pressed the buzzer to call the midwife in.  I'd just about convinced myself that I was going to have to have another section, and was feeling pretty low about it all, so I couldn't quite believe what was happening.  The midwife checked me and I was all ready to go!  For some reason I fully expected this bit to take ages, but it really didn't, with every push the midwife kept saying right this next one will be it, but I thought she was just saying that.  Less than half an hour later he was born!  The head arrived, and I was really quite surprised how easy the rest was, he just slipped out with the next push, and was born at 8 minutes past 4 in the afternoon, 17 1/2 hours after I got to the hospital. The midwife put him on my chest, I'd been so convinced that he was going to be a she, that I was quite surprised to see his boy bits!
I fed him almost straight away, and he had a good feed, which I was so pleased about.  He looked just like Kai did, newborn, except he was a pound lighter and had black, curly hair.
After the event Mike told me that when his head appeared, he was listening to the midwife who said that I had to really concentrate on the next push, and take it slowly.  He'd decided to really concentrate on what was happening, so he could see everything that happened.  I'd taken a look at the baby's head and asked if all was alright, I'd been quite surprised as I hadn't realised that he would be quiet at this point, and have his eyes closed.  The Midwife said he was fine, but Mike was thinking, oh no, there's something wrong, she's just saying that.  He says that he thought, right don't panic, and looked at the heart rate monitor.  As this was still going strong, he relaxed as the baby must be fine, only to realise that Mahe was on my chest and he'd missed it while he was thinking all of that.
After they'd sorted me out downstairs, they sent me for a bath and then put me in a wheelchair back to the ward.  They handed me Mahe and were about to wheel me out, when suddenly everything started to go black and I realised I was on the verge of passing out.  I quickly handed Mahe back to them while I recovered, didn't think it was a good start to drop my baby.  I was soon feeling better though, and able to settle down in the ward for a well deserved relax.

Been a long time....!

I've been completely useless at writing anything on here lately, sorry!  But just for a brief catch up, I've been very busy with work lately and of course looking after my little man.  Not only that but we've both been in the local paper, hope that this is big enough to read:

Uttoxpaper1

And then because we are clearly the only mother and baby that they know about at the paper they phoned us for another quote a few weeks later!  So here we are again:

Uttoxpaper2

I'm afraid I'm going to cheat a bit today, and not really write much myself.  Have to go feed the little man, just wanted to share our 'fame' with you though!

Stand up for yourself!

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My little man seems to be growing so fast at the moment!  Look at him here standing up, well nearly, he does need support and doesn't stay up right for vey long, but at six and a bit months I think that it's very impressive.  Not sure if he should be standing up of course, but sometimes you try and sit him down and he's having none of it!  He puts his legs rigid so that he's standing!

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He certainly seems impressed with himself in any case!  I think I've said before, I'm torn by wanting him to grow up and do things, and not wanting him to grow up at all.  Very silly of me I know, but I can't help it, it's so exciting when he does something new, but the thought of him being all grown up is so sad, I know that there is a long way to go yet though!!

It's been another beautiful few days, we even had the first BBQ of the summer on Saturday, and I've had my legs out in the sunshine, I do only have one skirt that I can fit into though!  Have to do something about that, not sure what!
Kai is giving me a few minutes peace at the minute, I'm supposed to be writing flyers, posters and the like for my cloth nappy venture, but I've got a bit distracted by writing this!  Just have to show you how Kai is sleeping at the moment,

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he has taken to moving round lots before he drops off, and sleeps on his side now, all curled up.  Went in to check on him a minute ago and he was like this, totally turned round in his cot!  Crazy little man!
Hmmm, really better get on now, while I have a few minutes to myself I suppose!

They quoted me in the Guardian!!

I don't buy a paper everyday, to be honest I usually only get one at the weekend, I don't really get chance to read one other than that, and the weekend paper will last me all week.  Any way I was so irritated the other day when I found that eBay had decided that used nappies couldn't be sold as they were 'adult material' that I emailed the Guardian about it.  Apart from a quick email saying that they'd had my email, I heard nothing.  I was very surprised to find out today that someone had seen me quoted in there!!

Link to article

I nearly fell of my seat with the shock of it all!  How exciting?!?! That will teach me to buy a paper everyday!

Everything changes....

Well it's been a while since I've been on here, but many things have changed since then.  Kai has started weaning, which is great fun, although I cannot fill him!! How do I know when to stop feeding him, he certainly shows no signs of having had enough!! At least he's actually beginning to put some weight on now though!
I've also got a new job, well I will have two new jobs shortly, but one is definitely on the way.  Tired of my old 'life' as a concrete sales person I decided that if I HAVE to work (I want to be a stay at home Mum!!) then at least I should do something that I enjoy, so I am now going to go back to my old tour guide job at Marstons and work at Shugborough Hall, tour guiding and dressing up in period costume.  How exciting.  It's casual too, just as and when they need me, so I can spend as much time as possible with Kai.  I start properly next week.
Kai is trying his hardest to sit up and move around.  If I put him in a sitting position he will sometimes stay for a few minutes, other times I have to hold his hand, although more for balance than anything.  I'm so impatient, I want him to do it now, but I know that I will miss him being small as he gets bigger, I already can't believe how much he has changed!!

Falling Over!

Nearly there!

I can sit!!!!

Snow!!

As I'm sure you can gather from the title it's rather snowy here. I'm such a kid I love snow, not that I feel the need to go sledging or build a snowman anymore, but it just makes everything look nice.  Showed Kai it earlier, I don't think that he was too impressed though!

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It might have had something to do with the outfit I made him wear, it's a wee bit big for him at the  moment!

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I'm sure he'll grow into it soon though!
After all my worry of last week, I'm feeling much better now.  I was feeling better anyway, but after I took him to be weighed on Tuesday and he'd gone up to 13lb 5oz I felt so relieved!  To top it all, I was playing with him later that day and he rolled over from his front to his back.  I kept putting him on his front just to make sure that it wasn't a fluke, but he managed it again!  My little man! :-)

Check out my nappies!

Well I've managed to take some pictures of my home-made nappies, and I'm very proud of them I must admit.  Of course I had to get the little man to do a bit of modeling for me, but he loves to have his photo taken so I'm sure that he didn't mind!

Check out my new nappy!

Kai the super model!

Nappy open

Nappy in small size

I've made the nappy so that you can fold it down to a smaller size, so it fits him now, and open it up more to fit him later.  I've got plenty of the first sized nappies, so I thought this would be more useful.  And yes, I did cheat and copy one of my brought nappies!

I think the little man might be getting ready for a bit of food some how, I think that he wants to eat something he can really get his teeth into (even if they're not quite through yet!) as he was certainly trying to eat his bear earlier.

I'm hungry Mum

Yum yum bear for tea!

I think I'll have to find him something more nutricious than stuffed animals to eat somehow though!

Nappy Making!!

I'm feeling much better about the weight and food thing today, Kai seems happy and certainly has plenty of energy so I can't be doing that much wrong, and there's no point worrying if he looses weight one week, I'll have to see what happens next time!  He is a very long baby though, 65cm a few weeks ago and I'm sure that he's grown since then!!  Mind you, would be very surprised if he was a short baby, people would think that he was the milkmans!!

I've been making nappies over the past couple of days, and I'm feeling very proud of the results, they look just like the brought ones and are a fraction of the price, the terry fabric was only about £5 a metre including postage from somewhere in Bristol.  I had a bit of trouble getting the elastic right around the legs, but I think that I've cracked it now.  If nothing else they do the job!!  I haven't taken any photos yet, need my little man to model for me I think, but when I do I'll post the photos.

Breast feeding blues

I've just got back from taking Kai to the baby clinic and he's lost weight, he was 13lb last week, and this week he's down to 12lb 13oz.  I could cry!!

I thought that I'd done with all this weight dropping and worry after he lost loads at three weeks and had to go into hospital.  A few weeks ago I decided to try and phase out his top ups, which I was doing but hadn't managed totally yet - he's down to 2oz a feed and 4oz at night, and he has loads of time at the breast now.  I just feel really low, and despite my best efforts it really looks like the end might be in sight for the old breast milk.  I just feel so bad every time I give him formula, and now it looks like that might be all he's getting!  I know that if I go back to offering him more, then he will no longer be interested in breast milk.

The worst thing is I was convinced he was going to have put on loads, he's such a happy, lively, sociable baby and he feels very heavy to me!!  So when the weight showed on the scales I just felt terrible.  Sorry don't want to go on, should try and focus on the fact that he does seem to lively and happy and that at least I've managed to feed him for this long.